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Balloon Boy

Inventing: Revised

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Dontwakethebaby
"Ssshh. Don't wake the baby..."

This article is Not Safe For Work. The reason is Gore and it is highly advised you look at this page if you believe you should.


Hello, hello, and welcome to Fazbear University. I will be your proffesor. For today's lesson, we will be discussing on how to properly stuff a child in a suit. This is not as easy as it seems, many people have tried doing this, and they eithier accidentally killed the child during the procedure, or they were caught and executed by law. So, shall we begin?

MaterialsEdit

  • One offical Fazbear Entertainment springlock suit. They are two of these suits in existence, and you can easily acquire one for your procedure by stealing one from the backroom.
  • One child. Use the official Fazbear Entertainment springlock suit to lure the child to the backroom.
  • One spare suit.
  • One knife.
  • One hammer.
  • One bottle of bleach.
  • One odor removing spray.

ProcedureEdit

  • Enter Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. Immediatly run to the backroom, and steal one of the springlock suits.
  • Turn firmly the hand crank at the back of the suit.
  • Now that the hand crank has been turned, climb inside the suit. Do not touch or breathe on the springlocks at any time, or you will be slowly killed.
  • Now that you are inside the suit, find a child and lure them to the backroom.
  • Once you are inside the backroom, reveal yourself to the child, and tackle them.
  • Once they have been tackled, please lay them down.
  • Remove all clothing from the child.
  • Carefully cut the child's chest with the knife.
  • Continue using your knife to remove all muscle from the chest.
  • Once the ribcage is exposed, use a hammer to painfully break the child's bones.
  • Now that the organs are exposed, use the knife to carefully yank all organs in the chest out. You may throw these organs away, donate them for money, or keep them for food.
  • Great! Now that the chest is empty, it's time for one of my personal favorite parts. You must carefully cut open the child's head.
  • Use the hammer to crack the skull open.
  • Yank the brain out by using the knife.
  • Now that this has been done, grab a spare suit and open it. Make sure it has an endoskeleton inside, so this part is as painful as possible.
  • Violently stuff the child's body inside the suit.
  • Carefully close the animatronic.
  • Take the bottle of bleach and use it clean up all of the blood that spilled.
  • Use the odor removing spray to remove the foul smell.
  • Quickly run out of the pizzeria.
  • You have finished properly stuffing a child in a suit.

Credited to South Ferry, original story by Odd Cheese

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